Before I get started, let’s address this side note: ‘surgery’ and ‘sugary’ are far too much alike. Speaking of sugar, it’s Halloween 2014 and my wife and I are cooped up in this hospital room. Chillin’.
Okay, got that out of the way. I had to spend a number of days in the hospital before moving forward with the surgery. This is because of the extreme inflammation my colon was experiencing when I was admitted. Surgeons prefer to extract a healthy colon versus bleeding, ulcered ones. Removing a less-inflamed colon reduces the possibility of complications and infections further down the recovery road, so it’s nice to know my surgeon doesn’t want to rush into this and prefers a near-flawless approach.
The operation will begin at 7am this morning. I have been on a Clear Liquid Diet all day, and finally managed to finish watching Django Unchained after 7,200 interruptions today (thanks, Netflix!). I also had to drink a GoLYTELY solution – a miserable experience. It’s not that it tastes too bad, more that it fills you up, and you have to wait for your body to release the “tension”. I drank about three liters of the stuff beginning around 4pm, and after about six hours of waiting it finally kicked in. The solution draws water into the colon resulting in watery stool; thus, a clearing of the bowels.
In about 6 hours I will take a dose of anesthesia, and will have my colon removed. I keep reading (and being told) that this is a major surgery to take very seriously, but I would rather not look at it that way. I would rather look at it as me being a time traveller. While loved ones sit around, count the hours and await word from the doctor, I will be a blank slate – completely comatose. Time will mean nothing to me. I will simply wake up with some pain and discomfort in my abdomen and will have no idea how long it took me to get to this point.
My next post will cover whether my expectations stated above happened or if something totally different occurred. Thank you for reading along through my medicine-muddied eyes. More painkillers to come. See y’all soon!
Colon Cooler Chat 
OK — I’m now in your circle of blog-readers, Zac boy. I will be following your account of this adventure and I will leave an occasional commentary.
GOOD LUCK, in every possible way, as Monday approaches. RB
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Thanks, Randy! Onward and upward!!
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Sugar skull? Sugar colon.
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Sweet, sweet sugar colon!
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I’m in your corner son, praying for you constantly! This blog thing is new to me too. Once I get the hang of this I will be officially “HIP,” right?
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JJ Watt said he would sack the shit out of Mark Sanchez for you
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Friggin’ Texans!
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This is by far and away the most entertaining and informative colon blog I follow
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PA PA Richey –
We are praying for you Zac.. Get well soon and you and Leslie come see us.!
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hi Zac. Just reading your blog today. I don’t know what you are going through but I’m getting a glimpse through your posts. I’m thinking of you and Leslie and hope you feel much better soon.
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Rosie,
Thanks for dropping a note! I have (hopefully, HAD by this point) Ulcerative Colitis. This past Monday I had surgery to remove my large intestine which should be my “cure de force”. I created the blog to inform my future-self and any others that may be faced with the same or similar situation.
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I know it’s not the same but we had to get Julian a gtube (feeding tube). He has extreme oral aversions from being a preemie and won’t eat anything by mouth. At first I was scared about the surgery then worried about how this would affect him. And finally about the day to day issues of leakage and planning out when to leave the house etc. it’s amazing how quickly you get used to something that is helping him grow and be a little more comfortable. Not the same but similar. I know you will be glad you got the surgery. Hugs to you and Leslie.
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It is very similar, actually. Those questions and scenarios you run through for Julian mirror the questions and scenarios we run through. Still feeling our way through the dark it seems, but glimmers of light are becoming more frequent. Thanks for dropping that knowledge, Rosie!
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